I woke up this morning to about a foot of snow outside and
it was still coming down in huge snowflakes. With the wind blowing it looked
more like a blizzard, at least to my Texan eyes! I was on my way to meet
someone on campus so I had no choice but to brave the weather and start walking
fast. Since I am still new to this huge campus it took me a while to figure out
what road I needed to take to get to this ladies house. My GPS said it would only
take 15 minutes of walking, but I didn’t factor in the snow OR the fact that
campus looks a whole lot different in the snow. Since the wind was blowing hard
it was mandatory to walk with your face down to keep the snow out of your eyes.
Now you can image, it is relatively easy to get lost when you aren’t looking directly
where you are going AND everything is covered in white. Let’s just say I kept
begging the Lord to show me which way to go. I made it to the lady’s house
about 20 minutes late and had ice stuck in my hair, hat, and coat. We chatted
for a few minutes, she gave me the item I came to pick up and I took a deep breath
as I walked back outside in to the biggest “Blizzard” I have ever been in.
Reflecting back, I was so upset with myself that I couldn’t
find my own way to her house, I was late, and now I was soaking wet. All I
wanted to do was just to go home and crawl in bed. One word was brought to
mind. Entitlement. It is a disease that kills us from the inside out. It is nasty!
I didn’t think I was entitled to much until I remember walking through the snow
asking God if he was going to help me or not. Then I began to contemplate other
things that I expected God to give me for being obedient to Him. Many times we
as people get caught up with what we expect from God and we get angry when it
doesn’t go out way. David Marvin from The Porch Dallas put it this way, “it happens
when someone is getting involved in serving and falling hard after Jesus then
they hit a wall where they become bitter towards God that they are not to where
they want to be in their relationship status. They feel entitled to find Mr. Right,
or have good health.” We set expectations on social expectations not biblical
expectations.
In reality, I deserve hell and eternal separation from God. But
not only did God not give me what I deserved, but He gave me His best! I get to
live with Him in paradise for an eternity. I don’t know about you but I couldn’t
help but weep when I realized what life would be like without Jesus in it. He
has been my friend, my companion when I feel like I don’t have any, my peace
and comfort when I’m scared, my healer when I’m sick, my GPS when I don’t know where
to go. I literally could not breathe without Him.
The words from this song have become the cry of my heart. (low quality video, high quality lyrics)
Honestly, God broke my heart for the people around me that
go through their day just trying to survive until the next day. They have no
hope that things will turn out ok, they have no companionship when all their friends
are busy on a Saturday night, they have no one to talk to when they are lost. I
can’t even fathom what it is like to live in that darkness, can you?
May the Lord break our hearts for what breaks His. Enough for
us to have the compassion to speak life into the people around us.
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