The
room was stuffy and warm in the afternoon heat. I had brief conversations with
the ladies that were here for the ESL class, hoping to make a few new friends.
In an effort to make conversation, I asked her if she could teach me to wrap a
Hijab like the one she was wearing. She stood up, took the scarf I offered her,
and wrapped it around my head. I turned around to model my “new look” to the
other fifteen women around the room. Their reaction shocked me. They applauded with
ear-to-ear smiles!
Who
knew one thing, like learning something new, could open so many doors? The
atmosphere in the room changed after that. I had random ladies coming over to
me and pinching my cheeks. One lady came to give me a hug and said, ”So beautiful!” They accepted me. They welcomed
me into their everyday world, all because I wanted to learn something about
them and their culture.
An
“old friend” whom I have known for less than 24 hours, asked his wife why I was
wearing a Hijab. He asked her if I was Muslim. She replied, “No, she is a
Christian!” With a confused look on his face, he reasoned with her. “But last
night when she and her friends came to our house to pray for us, I noticed she
prayed with her hands held out, palms up. And today she is wearing a Hijab!” I
explained that yes, I do pray with my hands out as if to be expecting
something. I told him, “I have a relationship with God and I know He hears my
prayers. When I pray, I pray with confidence that God will answer my prayers.
Therefore, I hold me hand out expecting God to act. As for the Hijab, I learned
something from my friends today.” He thought long and hard about my answer as I
continued to answer the other questions his wife was asking. Thankfully, our
conversation became more of two-friends-being-real-and-honest-with-each-other,
rather than a simple polite conversation. I was even able to share The Story
for which I give all my hope to! God was really working on the hearts of my
friends from Iraq and Syria while they were seeking shelter in Greece.
There
is so much to learn about how to “do ministry” in such a diverse cultural
setting. But a week in Greece taught me a few things:
1.
You don’t have
to speak the same language to communicate. Did you know that 93% of
communication is non-verbal (without using words)?[1]
I don’t speak Arabic and many of my new friends are learning English, which means
they have about a 20-word English vocabulary. Yet, somehow, we managed to
communicate!
2.
“Servant
leadership” is the best approach to any ministry, especially cross-culturally. Sometimes
we think we come to offer them help or relief, when in reality, we should come
just to learn and listen to them. What can we possibly know that they don’t
already know? Jesus was a fitting example of this.
3.
When people have
been through traumatic experiences, they best thing to do is to love them. This
love can be shown in a variety of different ways, maybe its listening to them
process their experience audibly, giving them a comforting hug, praying with
them and for them. Or, maybe they just need someone to cry with them.
Side Story – The couple
I mention previously have been through “hell and back” as she describes it. I
can only imagine how awful it is to be going about your daily life and then suddenly
you are running from bombs exploding right in front of you. She suffered injuries
so terrible that even the doctor’s said she would never walk again. Miraculously
she was able to keep her family together and make it to safety, which is more
than what most families could do. She still is processing the grief of losing
everything and hasn’t had a chance to verbalize it. There was anger, there were
tears, there was apologies, there were words of appreciation for our listening
ears. With tears in my eyes, I offered this, “Can I give you a hug? I have no words to say, except that my heart is breaking
with yours.” And it was. We felt closer, I desperately wanted her to ask me for
the hope and faith that I have! I desperately wanted to share The Story right
there, but it wasn’t the time or place. Now I needed to be there to listen and cry
with a friend. That is what made the conversation (mentioned previously in this
blog) so impactful! God is working, and she DID ask me to give a reason for the
hope that I have! AND got to share that with her husband!
4.
God is working
in their lives, even if you think the conversation doesn’t go as planned, or their
reaction is hostile, or seems disinterested. A favorite illustration of this
is a story told in Mark 4 where Jesus talks about the sower who plants his life, casts the seed, waits for the crop, and gathers the harvest. The more you dig into the story, the more thoughts you gather (puns intended). I have to remember this when I attempt to make conversations with students on campus. Most are not interested in the topic of God, but a few of them are! Its not because I dont know how to engage others in interesting conversation, but its because God has been working on their hearts.
These are just the top few things! There is so much more to learn and "glean" from, but thank you for sticking with me through the story!
