2013 began with the anticipation of an adventure. Things changed, some of which will never be the same. I have more stories, I know a little bit more about the "other side of the world," and feel a little more aged. (Which is debatable to be a good thing or a bad thing...) I learn some incredible lessons, some of which I am still learning.
The last six months have been hard, but great! Adjusting back into my own culture is tougher than I thought. There are so MANY things we take for granted here! Like fast food (otherwise spending hours cooking for one meal), driving everywhere we go (other than walking), everyone speaking ENGLISH (so you actually know when someone is talking about you).
Things have gotten comfortable again, settling back into the old routine. Back to school, work, church, and spending fun day with friends. How is it that I still feel homesick? How can I be away and be homesick at the same time be here and homesick? WHY?!
Call it an "AH-HA!" moment or a "Lightbulb!" moment when everything just seems to click. Like "Why didn't I think of this before?!" Yesterday was one of those moments. During my Devo time (My one-on-one time with Jesus in the mornings) God just somehow revealed to me:
Brindley, you're homesick because your missing me! Before you went to Africa,
you were listening to me and watching for me.
You were more aware of me and what I was doing.
You did the same thing in Africa, because I was the only thing you were familiar with.
You held on to my Word, and you came to me everyday, and you trusted me.
You are only at home when you are with me. I made you that way.
And I am always here. Where is your focus?
That is what I have been missing! That's why sometimes my patience wears thin, why I give up trying to disciple people, why I just want to move back overseas. God is just as real here as he is there. It just depends where I look.
So in 2014, where is your focus? Do something bigger than yourself.
